Valentine's Day 2011 - 13th Anniversary of Our First Date

Yesterday was the 13th anniversary of mine and Nathan's first date. As we at a kid-free dinner at home (we had dinner after Coop went to bed), we talked about the last 13 years, how quickly they've gone by, and that we can't believe it's been that long. It's been a wonderful journey together!

I thought it'd be fun to put an old picture of us on here. This isn't quite 13 years old, but here we are 6-1/2 years ago for our engagement pictures.

Our first date was quite a story. We were both living in Boston. It was Valentine's Day, Feb. 1998, a Saturday. I'd just got off the phone with my girl friends, planning a "we hate V-Day/boys" party. As I hung up, the phone rang again, and I heard Nate say, "Hi. This is Nate Smith, from church. Do you know who I am? I have red hair and glasses." I said I think I knew who he was, and he proceeded to ask me out for dinner that night. I almost said no, simply because I already had plans with my friends, and I didn't usually accept a date less than 48 hours in advance. It was my rule. But I decided to heck with a stupid rule, and friends, I'd rather be on a date on V-day. So I accepted.

His side of the story is that I was his 3rd call that morning. The other two girls had turned him down. He says he almost didn't call me because he didn't want our first date to be on Valentine's Day--too much pressure, and too awkward. But he decided to give it a shot anyway.

I remember him at the door. He was wearing his "Cal" baseball hat. I was living with my parents at the time, and was nervous when I saw he was wearing a hat because my Dad hated it when guys wore hats all the time. What a funny thing to worry about.

We drove back to his place (a house he shared with 11 other guys--talk about a bachelor pad). He couldn't get a dinner reservation so last-minute, so he had made dinner for us. I remember he was so proud of the chicken fettuchini alfredo he'd made. But the funny thing was, my house was 45 minutes one-way, so by the time we got back to his place 90 minutes later, dinner was quite cold. I choked it down, and probably didn't eat much. But the place setting was cute. He'd moved the small kitchen table and chairs into the living room, put some candles on the table, and some flowers. It was cute.

After dinner we just talked forever, and then he turned on some music and we danced in his living room. I remember thinking how cheesy that was, but just went along with it. After being with him for a few hours, I was really starting to like him. I'd only kissed 3 other guys in my life, but for some reason, I threw all caution to the wind and kissed him. Yep, I kissed him on the first date. It surprised even myself.

I don't remember much else about that night, but I do remember him taking me home and asking me on another date before he left. We started seeing each other at least 2-3 times/week for that first 6 months, discussed marriage on our 3rd date, and the rest is history...

Happy 13th Anniversary, Babe! Looking forward to an eternity more!

I am NOT old...yet

My friend from HS had a blog post about feeling old, so I have to share this since we are the same age. If she's old, I'm old, and I REFUSE to believe that I am old yet despite.....

1. My hair stylist asking yesterday if I dye my hair to hide all the grays, or just dye it for fun. WHAT THE?! No one has ever comments on my gray hairs. I have to admit I've seen a lot more lately of those little gray buggers than I'd like to--too many to pluck. I blame it on stress, not age. Denial? What's that?
2. The other night I was preparing for an activity with the youth in our ward. I am over the girls ages 12-13, and part of the activity they'd planned was to share three items that represent things about themselves. I was going around my house trying to come up with three things, and asked my sister to help me decide. She said something about me liking music, and maybe I could take a CD. But then she made a joke that the girls wouldn't even know what a CD is, and how old I am for still having so many CDs. I was like, "Whatever! I can totally take my iPod!" and she was like, "You have an iPod? Ok--maybe you're not so old yet." I mean, really Sis?! Really?!

That night at the young women's activity, I told that story, and the girls laughed and said, "Sister Smith, you're not old. We know what CDs are; our Moms and Dads have them too and make us get them because they won't buy us our own iPods yet." I felt old.

But I'm NOT!....yet.

Sliding Doors

One of my favorite movies is Sliding Doors. It's a movie about a woman whose whole life changes by one split-second instance where she 1. Hurries and makes the subway train, and 2. She misses it. The movie goes back and forth between what happens thereafter as a result of that moment.

Today at church we had stake conference (a semi-annual meeting where all the wards in an area meet together as a congregation and listen to talks from stake members and leaders). I was in and out of the hall with Cooper the entire two hours, as were many other parents of small children. At one point, Cooper was pointing to a baby, and I looked over at it and saw that the father looked vageuly familiar, but couldn't figure out why. Later on, I was out in the hall with Cooper again near the end of the two-hour meeting, and this same guy passes us in the hall, stops and says, "Is your name Chrystal?" I looked at him and recognized a guy I had dated as a senior in high school, and again later in college--Blaine Edwards. Instantly I was thankful that as teenagers and as early 20-somethings we had minded our p's and q's and there was nothing embarrassing between us. However, it was still awkward. I had broken this guy's heart-- terribly.

We'd gone out 5 or 6 times in high school, but I'd always kept it barely more than friends since I knew he'd go on a 2-year mission for our church that summer after HS, and I didn't want any serious relationship. I was dating then just for fun and socializing. But after Blaine got home from his mission, Nathan and I were on a break, I was living back in Utah at the time finishing school, and Blaine asked me out. After three dates, while saying good night, he tried to kiss me, and I TOTALLY dodged him. I felt so bad. I mean, we'd been out at least a dozen times between HS and then, and I knew it was going to come up. But Nathan still had my heart, and not wating to lead Blaine on, I made it clear I just didn't feel that strongly for him. We were good friends and had a really good time together, but there just wasn't that spark.

Anyway, there's the history, and that was the last time I saw him. After that, he joined the Navy and moved to Maine. That was the last I'd heard of him. So there we were today, awkwardly making small-talk in the hall at church after 11 years, each of us holding our own baby. It was one of those moments that just makes you think...a Sliding Doors moment.

I wondered if I'd kissed him that night whether we'd have ended up together, and what the last 11 years of my life would have been like. Would I be as happy as I am? Crazy to think that Cooper wouldn't be a part of my life, but then again, maybe I'd have 4 or 5 rugrats by now. It was just one of those weird "Old Lang Syne" moments that just made me wonder.

It's crazy the roads life takes you: the meanderings, the times when you feel like you're on a fast-track and just can't slow down, and all the unexpected bumps and turns. That's life, I guess. But there are so many small decisions we make every day that affect larger things in life. I think about things I choose to do or not to do each day, things I've done in the past, or plan to do in the future, that have or will affect the major outcome of my life. It's so important to live right, to stay in tune with the Lord, so you don't just get lost in all of it. I'm so thankful for the place my life has lead me thus far. I'm thankful for the Atonement of our Lord Jesus Christ, and for the power of forgiveness, so that when we do make mistakes, we can make it right again. I'm thankful for my husband and my son.

I'm thankful to be in a place in life where I can say that I'm truly happy with myself. It's not easy to say that sometimes, and I know life will eventually throw things in my path that will make me question my abilities as a woman, a wife, a mother, an employee, or whatever hat I will be wearing at the time. But for now I can say I'm truly happy, and I thought I'd better record it. :)