The Man Code

Last Sunday in time for the Superbowl, I brought Cooper downstairs and said, "Daddy! I'm ready for the Superbowl party!"

Instead of being excited over how cute Cooper looked, Nate was dismayed. Apparently there is an unspoken rule in "The Man Code" that if your team is not playing in the game, you don't wear their colors. Being a female, I thought that was a weird rule. Why wouldn't you want to show team spirit? Nate said, "Because wearing your team's colors when they're not in the game is just a reminder that they're NOT there and you wish they were." Oh.

Nate says I have a lot to learn about a man's world and that I have to learn it before Coop is like six so I don't teach him the wrong thing. Oh.

Well, doesn't he look cute anyway?

From head....

to toe...

and even his backside...

Cooper was ready for our superbowl party thanks to the great Patriots' jersey and hat Uncle David sent him. (Note his little football next to him.) Well, it should still fit him next year, and we'll hope the Pats make it so we can cheer them on and get to wear this outfit to a Superbowl party again!

And maybe by then I will have learned more of "The Man Code." Humph.

Good Morning!

This morning, like most days, Cooper woke up babbling and happy. Since I didn't have to rush to go anywhere, I grabbed the camera and popped into his room to snap the moment....

What a great way to start the day!

This one was taken a few days ago. Cooper was eating bananas for the first time, but as soon as the camera appeared, he was much more interested in it than the new taste in his mouth.

And here is Cooper playing while I blog. This is a perfect example of the consternation he shows when playing. It's like he's always got to figure out the toy, not just enjoy it. Funny kid.

New Family Perspective

Ever since Cooper was born, I have an entirely new perspective on the value of human life, on family values, on love, on children, on joy, and on the importance of families. I can hardly watch on tv or listen on the radio shows or stories involving harm to or death of children. My mind always reverts to how I would feel if Cooper were that child. Being a parent is an entirely new gamut of emotions, thoughts, and feelings.

Well, yesterday was our church Stake Conference. (For more on what that means, click on the link. In a nutshell, our church is organized by geographic location. Our local congregation we meet with every week is comprised of usually about 80 local families, which is what we call a "ward." A "stake" is usually about 5 wards closest in geographic location.) We have a conference twice a year where various church leaders speak, two conferences as a world-wide church (General Conference) and two ther conferences as a Stake (Stake Conference).

Yesterday our stake conference was a live broadcast of speakers from our church administration in Salt Lake City, UT. The last speaker was Elder Henry B. Eyring of the Quorum of the 12 Apostles. He spoke about families, about being as a little child, etc. His talk was full of ideas that struck me in ways I have never felt before I had a child. That is completely natural, of course, to have different ideas/thoughts/spiritual inspiration apply to whatever course of life you're in. As I sat there listening and contemplating his talk, several things struck me.

1. It is important to read the scriptures to your children, even before they are able to understand the actual words (or able to read). I never thought about that before. I mean, I figured we'd start reading scriptures with Cooper when he was about 2-3 years old, when I can at least explain in children's terms what something means, or when he can follow some sort of story. But Elder Eyring had a good point. He said children are usually eager to listen to the word of the Lord, even if they don't understand the WORDS because they can FEEL an understand the SPIRIT that they will feel when hearing the word of God. They that when they hear the scriptures read, they feel happy and good. I had never thought about that, but totally agree. How often do we underestimate our children's spirituality?
2. I know from personal experience in my own family growing up that giving children the opportunity to pray is also especially important. As we have family prayer and give our children the opportunity to pray specifically for other family members, that child develops a stronger bond with those family members. It also helps children learn how to speak to their Heavely Father and recognize him as a true being they're speaking to when they are able to pray for specific things and not just ramble off a little rote prayer.

I'm having a brain cramp as I try to write this, which is unfortunate. I wish I had taken notes (yeah right--with a fussy baby?), or at least written things down when I got home. Meant to blog about it yesterday afternoon, but time slipped away from me. Well, at least I got two main points recorded for my future reference.

It's just amazing how having a child deepens your feelings. We were watching a show on the History channel the other day, and it spurred our feeling of needing to be more ready for emergency situations--more than we are now. With a child dependent on us for his sustenance, no matter what situation we may be in, it makes emergency preparedness much more of a priority. We have plans to ready our food storage, water storage, emergency kits, camping gear, make a family fire escape plan, a plan for what to do if something happened while Cooper is at the babysitter and we are at work...and the list goes on and on. Never before have Nathan and I felt such an urgency to get more prepared than we are currently for whatever may or may not happen. Kids change everything...

More Milestones of Note

Last Tuesday was Cooper's 4-month doctor visit. The results:

Weight: 15 lbs. 1 oz. (50th percentile)
Height: 24" (25th percentile)
Head Size:....wait for it.....97th percentile!

Yep--our kid has a HUGE head relative to the rest of his body. Guess that's where all his smarts come from.

I also forgot to include in my last post about recent milestones that he does raspberry lips all the time. It's like his favorite thing to do now. And last night he sat on his own for about 30 seconds. Won't be long now.

[I'll post a picture or two later...posting from work and forgot camera.]

Wicked Cute

Had to share these photos of Coop in his first Red Sox t-shirt (thanks, Nana and Grandpa!)


Wicket Cute



Hey look, Mom, feet!


Uhhhh....I didn't do it....

Ok...it was me. Sorry, Mom, I just spit up on my shirt like 30 seconds after you put it on me...are you mad?

You can't be made at this! I'm too cute!

Huh?

Yikes! Flash!

I want that camera, Dad! I'm coming to get it.

Is it baseball season yet? Go Sox!

Cooper's Milestones - 4 months

Cooper will be 4 months old tomorrow. Wow--crazy! The last month has been a whirlwind of milestones for him.

• Just after Christmas (like 2 days after we got home), he started giggling. Here is a video or two of it (sorry it's sideways, Nathan turned the camera up, not realizing we couldn't rotate the video later.) Such fun to make Cooper giggle.
  

• Baby Talk - Cooper has found his voice. And boy does he LOVE to talk. When he's awake and not eating or spitting up, he's usually talking. Having his fingers in his mouth, which is also about as often as he's awake, does not stop him from his constant stream of baby language. Him being awake in church may now pose a problem...How do you get a 4-month old to be quiet without a pacifier, which for some reason he only likes when he is nearly asleep, or between the hours of 7-8 pm before bath time. Yes, I ended up with one of THOSE kids who doesn't really like a pacifier.



• Squeals - Along the lines of giggles and goos, add to the mix the occasional squeal. When Cooper gets very excited about something, he squeals a very high-pitched squeal of delight. Cooper also squeals when he wants your attention, and he has a much lower-pitched squeal/scream of frustration or anger. He is already learning how to get his way and how to throw fits when he doesn't get what he wants. I have already started using the word "No" on occasion when he's doing something I REALLY don't want him to do. I say it short, succinct, and in a low tone of voice, and he understands now that that means to stop whatever it is he is doing. Now if only he remains so obedient....hah!


• Rolly poly - Cooper is a little roly poly. Before Christmas (which was his 3-month b-day), he started rolling consistantly from belly to back. Back then if I put him on his belly, he would endure it for no more than 2-3 minutes after which time he would loudly protest. Last week, after a week or so of trying and trying, he finally mastered rolling from back to belly. He thinks this is great! Now when I put him on his back, he almost immediately rolls to his belly.


• Army-crawler...but only in circles - Cooper is learning to push with his feet and pull with his arms in a sort of army crawl to get to things he wants. He's not as consistent with this yet, but there are occasions where he will do this over and over, but not really go anywhere except in a circle. It's hilarious because you can see what he wants or where he wants to go, and he tries so hard to do it, but can't quite. I'll usually let him try for awhile and then help him when he gets mad that he can't do it yet on his own. He is very stubborn, but also persistent.


• Eating solid foods - I know you're supposed to wait until your baby is at least 4-months old to give them solid foods. Well, 2 weeks ago Cooper was clearly ready, and I figured 2 weeks was close enough. The first few bites he was unsure, but ever since I can't seem to shovel it in fast enough. He LOVES it. Tonight he was fussy and hungry. I was feeding him a bottle, but then decided to give him rice cereal before he got too tired. I stopped the bottle just as I was opening the cupboard to get out his bowl. He started to protest the taking away of the bottle until saw the bowl. Then he just watched in quiet anticipation until I walked over to the counter where the rice cereal was, and poured it into the bowl. He squealed in delight. What a kid.


• I have feet, Mom! Yes, Cooper recently discovered his feet. He most often plays with them sans pants. For some reason when his pants are on, he thinks his feet don't exist or something, but the second his pants come off...voila! Feet! [This outfit seemed to be the exception, so I snapped a shot.]

• Just tonight Cooper mastered holding his own bottle. I have not tried to teach him to do this. Maybe the baby sitter did? In any case, I was surprised and a little sad. Thank goodness he still nurses in the mornings, evenings, and on the weekends so I can still have my baby for most feedings. He's growing up too fast.



• Cooper wants very badly to be able to sit on his own. The bumbo chair only frustrates him because he can't reach things he wants. He is in heaven if we sit with him and hold him up while he plays. My guess is that he will be sitting within a few weeks. He's nearly there...

Other noteable Cooper-isms:

• Cooper is an awe of the camera. The second we get it out to snap a shot of whatever cute thing he is doing, he instantly gives us this face....and stares at the camera....

Getting the right shot is SO HARD with this kid!

• Cooper's favorite song is "Do as I'm Doing." A lot of times in the car he is loudly expressing his opinion about being in his carseat. No matter why he is crying or fussing, singing this song will very nearly always stop him mid-cry. Today in church I was helping Nathan teach the 4-5 year old class. During singing time Cooper was sitting on my lap, and they happened to sing "Do as I'm Doing." He immediately burst into a wild grin and flailed his arms around. He was too excited to even giggle. The chorister noticed it from the front of the room and commented. Too funny. Hey, he may not take a pacifier, but "Do as I'm Doing" works pretty darn good!


• Cooper also loves "The Wheels on the Bus" song, especially if you make his arms go "round and round."


• Cooper LOVES Julie Andrews' singing. I have an old Disney CD box set from when I was young. (I admit that I bought it when I was in my early 20s, hoping to have it for my kids someday.) I usually pop in a CD while Cooper takes a bath. He'll be playing with his toys, and not making any indication he's listening to the music, that is until Julie Andrews comes on singing one song or another from Mary Poppins. As soon as he hears her, he will stop what he's doing and just listen for a minute or two. He's even cracked a big smile a time or two. He especially loves "A Spoonful of Sugar" and "Stay Awake."


• Cooper loves to read. OK, not really READ, but he loves books. Every night before bed we read at least one, and sometimes he'll sit and let me read 4 or 5 in a row. He has figured out how to help turn the pages of his baby books. [He also likes to EAT the books as much as look at or listen to them being read.]
• To fall asleep Cooper MUST be swaddled tightly, arms included, and the blanket MUST be touching his face. If the blanket is not next to his face, good luck getting him to sleep! I did not encourage this behavior. Sometimes if he's in his carseat and I don't have a blanket readily available, I'll put his burp cloth around his face/head and fake him out. He instantly snuggles down.
• When he's really tired and wants to go to sleep, he's waiting for swaddling. The minute I lay down the blanket, lay him on it, and pull up one corner, he smiles. When entirely swaddled, he usually gives me a very happy and thankful grin. Speaking of which, I'd better end this blog and go do my swaddling duties. He's very loudly letting me know right now that I am neglecting his bed time.

Lunchtime thoughts about women

As I was stuck in traffic this morning on the way to work, I heard a story on Morning Edition on NPR (see story here) that spurred many thoughts about womens' rights, women who work outside the home, women who work in the home, dual-income households, single-income households, and a bunch of other thoughts. So as I sit here eating my lunch, I thought I'd jot down a few of the thoughts this story provoked, hoping that I don't offend any of you with my thoughts.

Many stats in the beginning of the news story caught my attention (taken directly from article referenced above):

• Until 1964, a woman could legally be fired when she got married. Even a woman with a college degree likely made less than a man with a high-school diploma.

[My thought on this...holy cow, really? We sure have come a long way for womens' rights.]

• For the first time ever among those age 44 and younger —-more women than men have college degrees.

[That's right girls--way to go!]

• "We found that increasingly, women are more likely to marry husbands who have lower education levels than they do, and lower income levels than they do," says D'Vera Cohn of the Pew Research Center. From 1970 to 2007, husbands whose wives earned more than they did jumped from 4 percent to 22 percent.

[Anectodally I know of three women at work who make more than their husbands, and all three have more formal education than their husbands. ]

• Stephanie Coontz, author of Marriage: A History. Coontz says that in a 1967 poll, two-thirds of women said they'd consider marrying a man they did not love if he had good earnings potential.
  "Now, women have a completely different point of view," Coontz says. "They say overwhelmingly — 87 percent — that it's more important to have a man who can communicate well, who can be intimate and who will share the housework than to have someone who makes more money than you do."

As it has become more and more difficult for families to live on a single-earner income, this makes sense to me. [The discussions of WHY this is, and the fact that many over-spend and probably could live within the means of one earner if they lived on a budget is a topic for another blog.] As a working woman, I understand the importance of a husband who is willing to cross traditional gender roles when it comes to housework, who is as involed in raising our son as I am, and who is loving and caring and can communicate with me. With both of us working full-time, we are both spread too thin to try and take on many of those traditional roles.

While I feel this is not the most optimal situation for our family (both of us working), based on my own tiredness and stress levels alone, there are some positive things that have come from it. For instance, Nathan makes a huge effort to spend time with Cooper, just the two of them, every day as I commute to/from work. I think Cooper has bonded with his father much more than your average baby since he has had much more time with him.

In addition, Nathan and I have always been a great team, not conforming to many traditional marriage roles. Many in my generation seem to be the same way in their marriages, and I think those 1950s stereotypes are somewhat a thing of the past--at least in homes where husband and wife are both formally educated. The more the education gap/lower education, it seems that the roles fall back into more of a split. I'm not talking about out of home vs. in-home work, I'm talking about household chores, child care, etc., which now that I think about it, probably does stem from the fact that the lesser educated person usually stays home with the kids and does more of the household duties....hmmmmm...

Well, this is a bit of a stream of consciousness as I write without editing since my lunch break is nearly over. Hope this hasn't been too choppy to understand what I'm trying to say.

One more point and then I gotta get back to work. Another stat in the news story said that women still only earn 77% of what their equal counterparts make in the workplace. It makes me a little upset to know that a man in my same position probably makes nearly 25% more than I do. I am not a big womens' libber or anything, at least not as far as saying that women should be given EXTRA rights or EXTRA opportunities when compared to our male counterparts, but I DO believe in equality. If I am doing the same job, with the same skill set, and doing just as well, I should be paid the same. However, I do understand the difficulty from an employer's perspective of having your female employees constantly come/go due to maternity leave and child care. But as more and more companies start offering paternity leave, and as men share in child care more and more, I hope th gap in our wages begins to close a bit more.

As I reflected on Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. yesterday, the things he stood for, the movement he started, I also reflected on my own human rights, some of them being related to being female, and I am glad to know that things have improved greatly, but I think we still have a ways to go...

That's MY opinion anyway. And since this is MY blog, well that's all you get. :)